With a Little Help From My Friends

Hey everyone! I'm sorry for not posting in so very long… I've really been struggling with managing my life outside of my blog and simply haven't made time for it. Sleep has become my closest friend and worst enemy, as my levels of exhaustion have risen dramatically. I had blood work done over Christmas break, and it was determined that my D levels were practically non-existent, so I've been taking a supplement to help with that. Unfortunately, however, I managed to lose my pill case last week, and was a wreck as a result(found it a couple days ago though, and am on the road to recovery).

As most of you are aware, my grades last semester were pretty terrible, and I'm afraid I have bad news--so far this semester, they aren't really improving. So, school right now=stressful. Largely due to the fact that I struggle to stay awake in class and while I try to do my homework.

But, in more positive news, I managed to find a job with the help of a dear friend and am now working at my university's IT Service Desk, which I'm thoroughly enjoying (most days anyway). I did get threatened with termination because I'm always sleepy, but my boss was having a bad day, and since then my work schedule has changed so that I'm coming in a bit later one day, and traded an early morning shift on Tuesdays (when I always have a paper due) to an afternoon shift on Mondays. Work=mostly good.

As far as my personal life goes, in one regard it is complicated. One of my friends and I have been on the verge of being more for a while now, and our friendship took a more than friendly turn… per his suggestion, we're taking a break from spending so much time together/resting together until after Spring Break, at which time we'll evaluate our relationship and decide if we'd like to pursue something. Also, like the last time we spoke, I'm lucky to have the friends I do. They've all been there for me despite the fact I've been downright pathetically weak and don't really deserve any support, and that blessing has kept me sane.

Yesterday one of my friends, my first real friend here at college(and someone in whom I confide), figuratively held my hand as I called the counseling center to set up an appointment. The stress has just really gotten to me, and with my little collection of physical issues (D deficiency, hormone deficiency, depression, malrotation, etc.), the combination is overwhelming. Also, one of my instructors who is fairly aware of how I've been doing suggested that I contact the dean of students to see if they can help me out with my other courses--I slept through an exam worth 1/5 of my grade for my Mass Comm class the other day (about 5 days into going without medications), so I'm going to see if they can help with that (I think). SO, what's the point of this post anyway?

Well, it's actually me taking the opportunity to get a grasp on the issues I'm facing and lay out a battle plan. Here goes!
-School: meet with counseling center, contact dean of students in regards to MC, improve sleep schedule
-Work: take more extensive notes, talk with my mentor about FootPrints, improve sleep schedule
-Personal: try and respect his desire for a break, be patient, rejoice in my blessings, and improve sleep schedule.
-Common theme: life would be a heck of a lot better if I wasn't tired all the time!

I guess what matters at this point isn't the hole I've managed to dig myself into(dwelling on it won't make it disappear)--it's how I'm planning on getting out of it. And I AM planning on getting out of it--hopefully the steps I'm taking in seeking aid, instead of stubbornly and silently suffering like last semester, will be what I'm looking for. After all, it's pretty hard to pull yourself out when you're in over your head. Thanks for letting me vent--I hope to have something more interesting to post next time :). Miss you guys--feel free to email me whenever!

A Scavenger Hunt, a Dance, Finals, My Birthday, Old Salem, A Museum, Final Grades, and Upcoming Christmas.... The Readers Digest Version!

Hey everyone! Since my last update, I've attended a winter formal (dance), taken my finals, been sent back home for Christmas break, celebrated my 19th birthday, gone to Old Salem, gone to Reynolda House Museum, and gotten my final grades for the semester.

The formal was a lot of fun, as was the manner in which Jonathon asked me to it! I basically was sent on a cross campus scavenger hunt down memory lane, and it was pretty amazing :). Each clue was attached to a memory that he and I shared, and it was so wonderful reliving all of those good times at once! I also had to climb a tree for the first time in years, which was fun! We had a great time at the dance--even though Jonathon and I were dates, we still went with our group of friends, and we all had dinner together before we attended the formal. I wore my prom dress (some of you may remember it--very colorful), as did some of my friends, and one friend's sister curled my hair. Here's a pic of Jonathon and I from before the dance:


And here's a few candids:





In the weeks following formal, I had to prepare for and take my final exams. I actually did really well on my finals (95 in one, which required two essays to be written by hand in 2.5 hours… the scariest thing in the world for me xD), but even a 95 couldn't make up for the fact that I didn't finish half of my work on time… but more on that later.
Right now, I'm writing from NC, back at my parents house. I got a ride from another NC student at my college, who we met at a Charlotte summer send off party. Coming home from break filled me with apprehension, and I'm still a bit stressed to be here. Generally speaking, I'm looking forward to going HOME home--back to my residence hall. I am, however, enjoying some of my time here quite a bit, thanks to my sister. First off, we celebrated my birthday at Concord Mills (a mall, for those who aren't NC residents), and my brother and sis in law wound up meeting us there after a while. My facebook status from that night sums up what we did pretty well:



So that was my December 18th :). The 19th was a long day at the house (where I seem to be automatically discontented… need to work on that), but on the 20th Sarah and I went to Old Salem, and that night she let me sleep over at my brother's house (where she lives). When we got up on the 21st, Sarah asked if I wanted to hit an art museum, and naturally I said heck yes! :D. We went to the Reynolda House Museum of American Art, which had an exhibit on loan from the Smithsonian called Modern Masters. One of the pieces I liked:



Back to my grades--they suck this semester. I got one F (for an online course I repeatedly forgot about until I just gave up on catching up), one NC (for an ENGLISH course, which are typically my easiest courses… because I didn't turn in drafts for the second to last project, or the project itself, which were huge parts of the final grade. Everything I turned in I got great scores on), two D's (for my biology lab and for my liberal arts course, which I love), and one B (biology). Why are my grades so bad? Because I didn't complete half of the homework… I don't know how to explain, and don't want to make excuses, but I need to seriously reorganize my mind and stop with the perfectionism crap. I know I've posted it before, that I've got perfectionism issues, but they've never had these kinds of consequences before. I've always been able to keep myself under control and force myself to get crap done, and have always had straight As as a result… so this is kind of hard to digest. But next semester I'm determined to do better--largely because I know, if I don't, I could lose my scholarship and be stuck back in this house for much longer :/.


So, what's next? CHRISTMAS!! :D :D :D. I've done the majority of my shopping online, and am worried that gifts won't arrive before I head back to college (when I'm planning on giving my friends their gifts), but a few things have arrived and been wrapped :). I've already received two very thoughtful gifts from friends, and it's making me even more excited to GIVE gifts! I want to make people as happy as those made me :). My sister and brother and his wife will be coming over Christmas eve to celebrate, and I'm really looking forward to it. Well, I think I'm finally caught up… my goal was to be posting about Christmas BY Christmas, and there you have it. I hope that your holidays all go fantastically, and that you're able to spend time with those you love. That's what really matters in the end, anyway… the people you love, the relationships you have with them, and what you really mean to eachother. I've been so blessed to make such wonderful friends at school, and am looking forward to spending time with my 'family' again. I've also been blessed to have the siblings I do, and in a certain way I'm blessed to have my parents as well. They have, after all, helped shape me into who I am, made me stronger… and for that I'm grateful. There's a lot for me to be grateful for this holiday season, and I betcha there's a lot for you to be grateful for too--if you only take the time to think about it. Merry Christmas everyone, and God bless,

Giving Thanks

I started making a vlog for this post, but got interrupted three minutes in, and didn't really have the time/opportunity to start over. So here I go, typing it out--maybe I'll vlog again once I'm back in NC.

For thanksgiving, I rode with a complete and total stranger for 6 hours to SC, where we met up with my parents, with whom I headed down to GA where my grandparents live. I've decided not to post too much about my thanksgiving, which was relatively uneventful, and instead post about what over the course of that trip I was reminded to give thanks for--same difference ;).

• My friends--it was so hard saying goodbye before break, because my college friends are like my new family, and one was kind enough to walk with me to meet the guy I was riding with and make sure I'd be okay.

• My safety--riding with a guy I didn't know was stupid, and I was fortunate he was a decent human being.

• My sister's strength--she recently went through a tough breakup, but even though he was trying to hurt her via facebook and texts the whole trip she stayed strong through it all.

• My mom's love--she was so glad to see me after these months, and I felt very loved… my cousins failed to come over because they don't like being around people, even family, and don't talk… and I'm very lucky that I was raised by the woman I was.

• My papa's health--For many years now, there have been many scares regarding his health, but right now he's doing well, for which I am very grateful.

• ...and lastly, my freedom. From my parents constant bickering, from my mother telling me I'm hateful and evil just because I don't give her 100% of my attention 24/7… for my independence, for my new life, and for my ability to appreciate my old one nonetheless. For the strength it all has given me.

Anyway, I'm very grateful for my life, for my past, and my present, and my future. Right now, I'm half asleep, and am being spoken to, so I think I'm going to go now… love you guys,

When My Sibs Came to Town...

So a couple weekends ago, my brother, sister, and sister in law all came to visit me at college. My roommate was gone, and they brought an inflatable mattress and crashed in my room. Before their arrival, I was a nervous wreck, and was running around cleaning like a mad person. When I was finished cleaning, Jonathon came and gave me peanut butter and pretzels and tried to calm me down. Eventually they arrived, and I ran at them in the parking lot and attacked them with hugs. The first thing my brother said to me was 'you wear hats now!' xD. The first night they were here, we went to see the engineering college's presentation of Reduced Shakespeare Company, which was HYSTERICAL, with Jonathon and per his recommendation. They all had a fantastic time :). After that, we crashed in my room for a while, then went to dinner on the strip. When we came back, my brother and his wife went to sleep, and my sister and I headed up to 'the family room'--the study room where my friends and I all hang out. Most of the 'family' was in there, and it was so much fun to share them with my sister. Over the course of the evening, she broke up with her boyfriend, which wasn't easy for her. I think that being 9 hours away from him and having the support of myself and my friends really was the ideal situation for this to happen, and I'm grateful that she had the strength to do what she needed to do. Here is my brother crashed on the floor xD:

The next day I treated my sibs to dining hall food and gave them a bit of a walking tour, including the basement of the library and around the football stadium.

My brother kept playing with the lights in the basement, and I was running around turning them back on. In the afternoon, they went to Wal-Mart with a grocery list to do my shopping for me while I tried to do homework, and while they were gone I wound up napping, then being woken with a phone call from Jonathon, who wound up throwing rocks at my window. When they got back, they came with LOADS of food, as well as college gear for themselves :).

In the evening, a friend named Cody(who was of great help to my sister) accompanied us on a walk to a local park, which turned into an extremely long walk off campus and eventually to an amazing restaurant, where I had pecan fried catfish, half of a burger, and some gouda grits :D. It was fun to eat with my sibs and my friend, and they got along great, which really made my night. The next day my sibs and I had breakfast at IHOP, which was fun, and then went to Wal-Mart together and got a couple more things, and I returned some junk jewelry I'd gotten for Halloween and didn't use. After Wal-Mart, we said our goodbyes, and my siblings left… it was so hard to see them go. Here's a pic of us four right before they left:

Luckily, I got to see my sister again during Thanksgiving break… which will be covered in my next post :). Until then,

My Fall Break/Halloween

Hey everyone! I just thought I'd post about my fall break/Halloween weekend/Monday, because quite a few funny stories stemmed from the events that happened over those few days, and I thought it might be nice to make y'all laugh a little :). First off, a friend named Jonathon and I went to another friend's, my suitemate Katelyn's actually, house for fall break, to go to her church's Lebanese/Middle Eastern food festival and a local haunted furnace that had been converted into a haunted house (cue lightning). While at the food festival, I ate Kibbee, a delicious Lebanese dish, as well as kaak (which is somewhat cookie like and said 'kike'). I also bought my sister a bedlah (one of those jingly jangly skirt things the dancers wear), much to the amusement of my friends, who joked it was really for me.

After the food festival, Katelyn, David (her cousin), Ryan (her brother), Jonathon and I all headed to the furnace, and I've got to say, it was a TON of fun. Partly because I discovered that I completely FAIL at haunted houses--I kept laughing! I was truly in amazement at the makeup jobs these people had… it was so impressive! Funny story: at one point, this monster guy was shouting something, and I didn't understand him, so I yelled 'what did you say?', and then he hopped up on the other side of the fence from us and shouted 'do you wanna die little girl?.' He wound up asking if I wanted him to come over the fence, to which I responded 'I just wanted to know what you said!,' and he wound up doing just that. While he was storming in my general direction, I raised my hand, because I wasn't sure he'd be able to see me in the dark, and he yelled 'I can find you little girl! You don't need to be raisin' your hand!'. After he came over, he threatened to take out my teeth and kill me and all sorts of stuff, and I just said I was sorry, I just wanted to know what he'd said xD. He also said that I was gonna bust my head open inside the furnace, and that he'd come steal my teeth then, and I said 'thank you for waiting until they're out of my head!' automatically, cause seriously, who wants their teeth ripped out? Katelyn was livid that I'd 'attracted' the monster to us, and I said I'd try to do better. I guess that pretty much sums up my general attitude throughout the haunted furnace--genuinely impressed and fascinated, but not remotely scared, and cracking up quite a bit.

After the furnace, we went back to Katelyn's house, and then we watched Elizabethtown per Jonathon's recommendation. It was actually really funny and heartwarming, and I loved it :). After the movie, he and I just talked for a while, until eventually we fell asleep.

On Monday, Halloween, a couple days after our visit at Katelyn's house, she approached me and said that she was upset with me, that I was a terrible house guest, and that I'd offended her mother by acting 'weird'. The point is my Halloween had a bit of a rough start. But getting into costume (I was a ballerina style bat) was fun, and so was eating with Jonathon and Katelyn despite the unresolved tensions. Jonathon was a pirate for the first half of the day, and the Phantom of the Opera for the night (and our friend Lin was his Christine). Katelyn was a creepy porcelain doll, and other costumes of my good friends include Slytherin quidditch player, Cheshire cat, and Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's. Overall, Halloween was a lot of fun.
Random related things:

• You know that bedlah I got for my sister? Turns out she just bought one, so I get to keep the one I got--it WAS for me, after all, much to my friends' amusement.
  
• One of the main parts of Elizabethtown is when one of the characters sends another off on a journey, with a map that begins "this is a very unusual map"--remember that one for a future post ;).
  
• Jonathon suggested writing thank you notes to Katelyn's family for letting us stay, and within mine was an apology for whatever I did to offend. While chatting with Katelyn the other day, she said her mom said thanks for the note.
  
• I'm really freaking tired.

Thnks Fr Th Mmrs

I was recently informed that someone who was once my closest friend no longer wishes to speak with me, for various reasons, and sadly I understand. He's ready to move on, and if that is what is best for him, then that's okay… I made an effort, and I guess that's the best I can do. I still have a handful of happy memories from our time together, even though they are outnumbered. I think that the phrase 'all good things must come to an end' proved true over a long and painful amount of time, and a part of me… a small part, but still a part… is relieved that we're both now free from our strained relationship. Thanks for the memories, even though they weren't so great, I guess. But I'm not posting to pout, I'm posting just because it is a part of my life I'm letting go, and wanted to share that with you. Now, I'm off to make more happy memories in my new world, my new home, even though I'll never forget the people who helped make me who I am, him included. That's been my mission since I arrived at college, a mission I share with select friends… the phrase 'ah, memories' is in frequent use between one friend and myself :). I've witnessed a spider weaving its web, stood by while a friend swung my purse over his head to mess with bats, sat in a creek for hours talking, watched the sunrise with a friend from the roof, ridden around walmart in a buggy, ridden on bicycle handlebars, went to a Lebanese food festival, went to a haunted house (actually, a haunted FURNACE--more on that later), got primer in my hair that's STILL there, and of course, slept in various places other than my room (including the roof, in a bikini… we're not supposed to go out there, but I needed sun! xD). Haha, I'm an Olympic sleeper and champion memory maker xD. I guess that despite all of my constant stresses about my (to quote a friend of mine) 'metric shit ton' of homework, I really am learning to love life while I'm here. I'm happier than I've ever been, and that's good enough for me :). Talk to y'all later,

My First Vlog--Nov. 4

Hey everyone! I decided to give vlogging a shot--what do you think? I repeat myself some, and was nervous and sleep deprived, so it is kind of lame, but you get the idea xD. Share your opinions--I value them!

Thanks guys, love y'all, ttyl!

So... I Fail

Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't posted in forever, I'm just so freakin' stinkin' busy all the time, and my new laptop hates blogger so I have to use a different computer in order to post (which is why you're getting a music post and an update at the same time--they're both been waiting for me to get on another machine). So, general info: I dropped my honors chem class because I couldn't keep up with the homework and was bombing it, and replaced it with an online art history class, which I'm not doing so hot in right now. I'm writing a couple papers a week and am overwhelmed, and am writing this at 4:44 am on Tuesday… and at 9:30am on Tuesday I've got a four page essay due for English I haven't written at all, and at 11:00am on Tuesday I've got a 2 page reaction paper due I haven't even read the material for, and at 11:00pm on Tuesday I've got two biology homework sections due, and at 12:00pm on Wednesday I've got a monstrous research paper/lab write up due that I haven't started, as well as a test on material I haven't studied. Oi. Pray for me, please, those of you who pray… aside from the academic failures I'm succeeding at left and right, life is going okay: two of my friends are now in a relationship with eachother, which makes me happy, because they're both great and they make eachother happy :). I got to help out a friend with his art project, which involved painting giant multi-colored wooden pieces, and I wound up with paint all over me and my hair… and it has yet to wash off xD. I watched the sun rise with said friend, painted a giant banner for my dorm, went to the homecoming football game, and a bunch of other crap, mostly involving eating xD. I'm about to fall asleep, which isn't allowed considering all I have to do, so that sucks. I better stop writing this post and get back to my essay… I miss you a lot, Lauren and Bleah and Steph and Steph and Raisa and Antonia and Shaynie and Lia and Amanda and Max andddddddd well, it is now 6:17 am, I passed out mid sentence… sigh. Anyway, even if you're not named, and you know I love you--just a reminder :). Now back to that essay!

Leaving Home...

Today I leave for college. Tomorrow morning I move in. You know a couple posts ago I said something about getting a chance to breathe soon? Wait, lemme find it: "So yeah, I've been really busy the last several days, and haven't been home much at all. Today I'm going whitewater rafting with my sister, and tomorrow she, my dad, and I all leave for Georgia... so it looks like I'm going to be busy for a while yet. But I know that eventually this insanity will calm down, and I'll be able to breathe, and all I have to do until then is not panic!". Yeah, that. Well that break from insanity has yet to occur, as I've been going dancing and swimming and kayaking and rafting and ultimate frisbee-ing and LOTS of shopping and packing and a little crying and plenty of traveling in these past couple weeks. Then today I leave for college. And tomorrow morning I move in... and meet my roommate, call someone to loft my bed, register my bike for a permit, pick up my books, pick up my fridge, do some last minute grocery shopping, go to a cookout, and God knows what else will come up. The whole 'not panic' thing is getting tougher and tougher, but I'm doing my best. Right now, I need to finish up packing so we can leave bright and early tomorrow, then I'll sleep for the nine hour drive to a hotel by my college. Yes folks, I'm a little ways away from home. I've become closer friends with a couple people these past couple weeks, which I'm truly grateful to God for--hopefully we can keep in touch despite the distance. Lia, Stephanie, and Ayla--I just sent y'all an email, fyi. And Stephanie, Zoe, Jan, Raisa, and Hannah--I replied to your comments on the previous post. Thanks to all of you who actually read this post--sorry it's so dry, I'm just insanely tired :/. And thank you Ania for following my little ol' blog! I really appreciate it :). Until next time, when I'll hopefully have something more blog worthy,

Time is Running Out

You've probably heard that phrase before--I know I have a million times. Deadlines over school or tasks at work, time is always running out to accomplish something--or at least, that is the way it seems, with those deadlines we choose to create. But what about REAL deadlines in life? Personally, I've been thinking about that a lot lately. Heading off the college in the fall is going to tear me away from my parents and siblings and friends, but there's always next summer to spend time with them, right? What about my grandparents that I never see? My grandparents that love me but live so far away we don't see eachother, my grandparents who are beginning to have issues with health or memory, my grandparents who won't ALWAYS have next summer. Yet, do any of us truly have a guarantee of next summer? Life is short--sometimes much shorter than expected. And only in these past several weeks have I begun to LIVE in a way that acknowledges that. My sister and I have been spending more time together, I'm hanging out with the girl across the street, I just visited my family in Georgia… I'm focusing more on what matters, and what matters is relationships with people. I hadn't seen my grandparents in GA in quite a while, and when we arrived and I hugged Papa, I told him I loved him, and he quietly said "I love you too" and got tears in his eyes… and in that moment I couldn't remember why I ever considered not coming on this trip. Sure, I had reasons--I've got deadlines to meet for school, need to finish shopping and getting my books and making decisions and paying bills, and I haven't blogged properly in ages(even missed my one year blogoversary)--but in the end, all of that is relatively inconsequential. My Papa means so much more to me than that. And so does my sister, and my mom, and my brother, and certain friends. It is so. freaking. easy., especially in this day and time with the advances in technology, to forget how much more important human relationships are than impersonal updates on facebook or funny videos on youtube. This coming week I've chosen to go to a movie with someone I don't know all that well, but would like to, go whitewater rafting with the girl across the street, and go to Ohio to visit my relatives on the other side of my family. Yet another trip at one point I considered missing out on. Yet more time away from college preparations. But it's worth it, because you never know how much time you've got left. And I guess that's the point of this post--time is precious, and so are the people you love, so why not spend what time you have with them? These past several weeks I've enjoyed my life more than I have since… well, as long as I can remember. It's a pity it took me so long to figure it out.

After the Storm

Hey everyone! I can't believe it's been a week since the last time I posted... so much has happened! I got to hang out with my neighbor again, and then I spent another day at my brother's house, chilling with my sister and sister-in-law at their pool :). Then that evening I went to play ultimate Frisbee with some friends, hung out at McDonald's afterward, and picked up a graduation gift from a really good friend. After being dropped off back at my car, I went back to my brother's house to spend the night, and then realized I didn't have my graduation gift with me, so I checked the car, had my sister check the car, had my earlier ride check HIS car, another friend and his mom checked the parking lot where I'd been parked, and then after a very restless night my sister-in-law and I checked the parking lot ourselves and couldn't find the gift anywhere. The theory is that I left if on top of my car--in fact, I'm pretty certain that's what I did. But it's long gone now :/. After scouring the parking lot for a long time, I went back to my brother's house and took a shower, then grabbed all my crap and drove home, where I talked with my dad for a while then took a short nap. When I woke up I had to get ready for a party a couple hours away, a party for all of the NC students going to the college I'm headed to in the fall. Attending that was fun, though I'm not really one for making small talk with strangers.

That night, at about midnight, my mom and I hit walmart to buy me a bicycle. Then the next day, I had a job as an extra again--this time for a show called Homeland, starring Claire Danes. I was a 'girl on bike', hence the midnight bike run. It was an okay experience... but nothing as amazing as The Hunger Games. It's a paying job, though, and my new bike rocks, so I'm glad I did it :). So yeah, I've been really busy the last several days, and haven't been home much at all. Today I'm going whitewater rafting with my sister, and tomorrow she, my dad, and I all leave for Georgia... so it looks like I'm going to be busy for a while yet. But I know that eventually this insanity will calm down, and I'll be able to breathe, and all I have to do until then is not panic! A long while back, our area experienced a HORRIBLE storm... there were tornadoes nearby and severe thunderstorms and wind. Then, it just stopped... and the next day I took this picture:

 

I love this picture, because to me it means, when things are rough, 'this too shall pass'... there may always be a calm before the storm, but there's always a calm after one too--it's just the way life works out, depending how you choose to look at it. This storm isn't over yet, but when it is I'm sure the sun will shine and the flowers will smile up at it :). Anyway, now I'm rambling... just wanted to say I love you guys, and I'm sorry for not reading and commenting on your blogs. I hope to catch up more soon! :/. Thanks so much to Lia and Raisa for commenting on my last post, even though it wasn't much of one and I've been an unfaithful blogger. I really appreciate it :). Until next time,

Life IS Sweet DANGIT!

Hey everyone! Been at war with myself lately, because I've been swinging between 'so stressed I'm losing it' and 'having the best summer ever'. I realized I haven't done a life is sweet post this month, so I've decided to do it even though it is late-or rather, really overdue. So here it comes, the ten things sweetening up my life lately(ignoring all the crappy things, this is a pretty impressive list! :D):

1. Spending time with my sister. She, my dad and I recently went to the US National Whitewater Center, and spent our time climbing their adventure courses, a little ziplining, flatwater kayaking, and whitewater rafting. It was a pretty amazing day :). AND, my sister is totally beast at EVERYTHING, including the rock wall and flatboarding (I didn't even try that one-looked like too much work to be fun). She and I both bought season passes so we can hang there whenever :D.
2. Spending time with friends. I got to hang out with my filming family, Megan and Caroline, a couple weeks ago, and it was a lot of fun :). I'm also planning on seeing Deathly Hallows part 2 with my bestie Kels, which I am BEYOND psyched about :D :D :D. I'm going to wear…
3. ...my Solemnly Swear Necklace! I just bought this epic necklace, and while I haven't received it yet, I'm in love with it. I've been wanting to buy it for weeks, but didn't want to splurge… then totally gave in :D.

4. I. officially. have. a. DORM :D. And a roomie, who has friended me on facebook! :D.
5. I finally was able to schedule a college move in day! YES :D. August 20th, I'm officially at my new home… hard to believe I'll finally be free ^_^.
6. I survived the previously griped over math test from hell. I didn't even almost finish it, because we weren't allowed to use calculators and I had SERIOUS summer-math-brain, but I did what I could and got my result, which was the math class they recommend I start with. Looks like I'll be taking a simpler math (which originally really, really bothered me), but oh well, like my mom said, better than starting off with something crazy hard :).
7. My TWLOHA Shirt!!! :D :D :D. I LOVE this shirt I got from To Write Love on Her Arms, SO much :D. And it fits perfectly! Pic from their site:



8. Reading. I've recently read Divergent (HIGHLY recommend-I really, really enjoyed it), Rot and Ruin (Tom was my favorite, with his katana and everything, but Benny eventually became tolerable when he stopped hating on the poor zoms), and Carpe Diem (I LOVED HANKS, and Grandma Gerd, and eventually Vassar :D. Great story! Thanks for reviewing it Shaynie!). I have a couple books from the library, but am unsure of what to read next, and was thinking about buying Delirium on my Kindle. Have any of you read Delirium? Thoughts? And here are the titles I've gotten from the library:

• Warped by Maurissa Guibord


• Teenie by Christopher Grant


• Between Shades of Gray by Ruta Sepetys


• The Iron Thorn by Caitlin Kittredge


• The Latte Rebellion by Sarah Jamila Stevenson

Any thoughts on any of those?
9. The monetary rewards of filming-EG, my paychecks! They have finally started to arrive, and I am so glad. My bank account was running empty, but now it is running about half full (half of my ideal balance), which is a lot better.
10. And… my dad just baked cookies, so I think I better split ;).

What's been sweetening up YOUR life lately? I hope a lot :). Talk to y'all later,

The Day of the Prom :) (w/ pics)

How do YOU dance? When I got home from prom and started talking about it, my mom wanted to know how I danced on the floor, and I honestly don't know. I don't know 'how to dance', I just wing it… I have no idea how stupid I look, but I'm okay with looking stupid because I'm having fun AND getting exercise! :D lol. I don't exactly practice… I actually haven't felt like dancing in a long while (once upon a time, I danced in the kitchen every dang day while I listened to the radio and got food or cleaned or something). Haha, now I'm rambling. Starting over. Prom day was fairly interesting, and the first thing I did was get my hair done. I was about to fall asleep the whole time, but managed not to. The woman who did my hair is incredibly nice, and I got my entire head curled, then pinned up… it is kind of hard to describe, and I don't have any 'pre-prom-destruction' pics, but here are some 'I already went to bed but couldn't sleep and my head has been under a blanket' pics:

Then I came home, and my mom and I did my makeup, and we wound up going over the time we'd mentally allotted and were late for the photo studio (but the photographer was okay with it, fortunately). When I got there, I changed into my prom dress (I'd been wearing a stretchy sundress thing from the beach all day, even though it was raining and storming… lol, poor planning, but it worked out okay because it wasn't too cold). Here is the dress-brace yourselves, it has personality ;):

The photographer was nice, but I kept having to refocus him-we just wanted a basic full length shot, and he wanted me to lay on the floor on this fuzzy white thing and look up at the camera, along with other interesting poses I knew we wouldn't wind up keeping. My mom shocked me with her patience-she only gave him ugly looks, and let me do the polite redirecting. After quite a while, we were finally finished, and it came time to make a decision. We were starving, the dude kept trying to add effects to the pictures, and we were tired, so momma asked if we could come back another day and make up our minds which shot we want printed (we'll do that Wednesday). Afterward, I changed back into the sundress, and we tried to figure out where to eat, and realized it was SATURDAY and that Olive Garden and Macaroni grill would be insanely packed, so we tried Texas Roadhouse and there was a line outside in the rain. The only place we knew we'd be seated before prom was OVER was Golden Corral, which wasn't exactly my first choice, but I ate some nice bourbon chicken and rice, and some fried shrimp, and I saw two girls in prom dresses there so I wasn't alone in my prom dinner choice. My mom and sister(she met us there) talked about work the whole time, and they are CNAs, so it was an interesting conversation for dinner xD lol. We left a little after prom started, which I was fine with, especially because I was planning on slipping in and changing in the restroom before being seen. That did not happen. The prom photographer was in a room off the same hall as the bathroom, but before it, so I wound up walking past every stinking body else, who were all in line for photos. Haha, wasn't what I planned, but I did make it to the bathroom and changed, and then joined my friends who were already in line for pictures (and had been waiting for 30 minutes already, so showing up late did work out in way). After we got our individual shots taken, it was almost time for senior recognition, so she told us to come back for the group shot later. We danced some, and then it was time for the senior class to be recognized, and there were tons of seniors! I was kind of surprised by the size of the graduating class, and the photographer was determined to get us all in one picture, so after being recognized we lined up, tall girls sitting in chairs in the front, then the shorter people (girls and some guys), then the medium/taller people in the back (mostly guys, since the tall girls were sitting). I didn't know if I was tall or not, so I just stood for a while, then she pointed at me and another girl and asked us to sit, and the guy behind me said 'she's a tall girl, she's taller than me!', so I guess within that group I'm on the tall side (but I don't think 5'7" is tall, and my heels weren't very high… do you?). Long story short, she eventually made us all squish and she walked across to the other end of the dance floor to take the shot. And then we were FREE!!! Haha, I danced almost every song, only missing those that played when they were setting up tables outside because the rain stopped and I offered to help dry them off (they were soaked!). I knew several people, and danced with the group I've come with the past couple years, which included Henry and Kels (I've known her since… 4th grade!). Haha, when a guy from my physics class asked how I knew her, I said 'she's mah bud' xD. Here's us:
So yeah, this ties in with the whole 'I don't know HOW to dance but I like it' intro ;). The music was better than last year, when they played a lot of Christian rock (which I enjoy listening to, but dancing? Heh, no). So yeah, I danced all night and jumped up and down and did the cha cha slide and laughed at myself and had a great time :D. After prom, I was determined to do SOMETHING (I'd brought a car so I could do whatever and stay out late, preferably get icecream), but Kels and two other girls had to go home, and Henry said he had to get home, and four of us were game for something, so Henry (who lived really close to the venue) invited us over to his house for icecream. I accidentally drove past it (and had passengers), but we turned around and got there in no time xD LOL, my bad. Then it was me, R(girl), D, M, and Henry(all guys) just sitting around and talking movies and music and Twilight and M. Night and whatever while eating icecream, and it was a lot of fun :). The time after prom and the time talking with the guy from my physics class and Kels were probably my favorite parts of prom, aside from dancing :D. When it was really late, we split up and headed out, and after I'd been on the road awhile I realized that I couldn't find my purse, which contained my phone, and I was supposed to call when I was on my way home. So I got off at an exit, went to a well lit Wendy's parking lot, checked the car thoroughly, then turned around and headed back to Henry's, positive that I'd left it on top of my car when I was unlocking the door, and hoping it fell off in the driveway. When I got there, I walked around the driveway barefoot, couldn't find it, and went to get back in the car, when I saw it sitting in the corner of my stinking seat. I'd been sitting on it the whole time. It was purple and silk and kind of matched my dress, which makes it semi-forgivable, but yeah. Yay me and yay for my big ol' butt. So, very relieved and thanking God that I didn't lose the purse, camera, license, debit card, and phone on the interstate, I called my mom and said I was 'leaving Henry's now', cause I was xD lol. Eventually I made it home (like 1:40 something), and told her about my purse near-disaster and how great prom was :). And, as a plus, my hair stayed up and solid the whole night! It didn't bother me at all, which was great, because it is short and full of layers but she managed to get it up and secure. 'How?', you may ask! Well, after I took the pics of my hair from above, I took my hair down, and kept finding more and more and more bobby pins (which I didn't even provide). Here is the hardware that kept my hair up:
And here is a very blurry and oddly lit picture of me yesterday evening, after sleeping for hours:
Haha, hope this post didn't bore you too much-I really had a great time and my calves are killing me, and I only have one regret (which is more like a 'if I'd have known x, I would have done y, so I don't feel guilty or anything because I just didn't know). Definitely the best prom I've been to ;). I couldn't sleep until past 8:30am, and wound up reading The Replacement (which I mostly enjoyed, though I couldn't really connect with Mackie :) ). I also washed all the hairspray out of my head yesterday, and this is what my hair NORMALLY looks like (taken this morning, sorry I look ticked... I almost always look ticked in pictures xD lol):
(Bleah, do you see what I meant about it being kind of choppy with random pieces doing whatever they want? lol :) ). Anyway, I've got to run and make some guacamole (long story). Talk to you wonderful people later, and thanks for reading :D!

Where is the Love? (and What's With All the Hate?)

Hey everyone! First off, I'd like to thank Victoria and Nahla for following (and thanks Victoria for the comment & prayer)! It was such a pleasant surprise to see that you'd found my blog worth reading, and that I'd hit the big 4-0: my blog is officially over the hill ;). Kind of exciting :D. And now, onto the reason I'm writing this post…

For quite a while now, I've been growing increasingly aggravated by the way people behave online. I'm talking about the catty insults and comments through almost every social network, from anonymous jackholes and 'friends' alike. I wasn't bothered by it on Blogger, which is why this is where I'd spend the most time online-a positive environment with people who have better things to do than flame eachother. However, even here, lately things have been rough. About a week ago, I decided to get a Formspring account, because I knew a couple people who had them and thought it sounded fun. Once I got on and made some connections, I was appalled by the things some people were being told, and deeply angered by the cowardice of anonymous 'questions' that recommend suicide and do nothing but insult and tear down their target. I haven't just seen it on one page, either-it seems to be happening all over the place! What bothers me in a very different way is when friends fight over nothing, and things get blown out of hand, because they choose to speak before they think. Recently the amazing Ayla wrote a post on this issue, and instead of me getting worked up and rambling about just how wrong it all is, I'm going to share some of her well chosen words with you.

"...this hate isn't coming from low-life spammers anymore. This is coming from people we used to be friends with.
I'm going to come out with it: WHERE IS THE LOVE? What happened to when we could all log on to Blogger and say what we wanted without people trying to shove their own beliefs down our throats? What happened to being able to stand up for our rights without being accused of, among many other things, a "satanist" "disgusting" "fat" "ugly" "putrid", or, my personal favourite (read: sarcasm) "A piece of trash"…"

"…I'm not accusing ANYBODY who I follow, have followed or who I've emailed. This is about a problem Blogger is experiencing IN GENERAL. I understand standing up for your beliefs. But does that mean you have to tear someone else's down? Aren't some of the things God teaches are patience, love, and tolerance?
Jealously, hatred, fighting - they don't impress anybody."

Read the complete post HERE, it is worth your time.

I know that I don't always make the best decisions when communicating online-the aforementioned jackholes really deeply anger me, and sometimes my words are not well chosen. Nobody is perfect. But I'm really trying to pay attention to how I treat others, in my personal and family life, as well as in online communities. I know where my weaknesses are (when I don't believe something is fair, for example, I'm quite a stubborn mule for what I see as justice and a volcano of pure fury-gotta work on how to EXPRESS those feelings in a more respectful way that people can understand). And I think something people often forget is that it isn't always what you say-it is HOW you say it. What I'm asking is that anyone reading take the time to think about the way they're acting, try and assess the way they handle situations they don't like, particularly online. This isn't going to get fixed unless we all make an effort-though I have to say you guys pretty much rock, and I haven't seen too much trouble from ya ;). Sorry for the dreary post-just needed to let some of this frustration out. Anybody sympathize?

Life is Sweet :)

I'm finally joining up with the Life is Sweet meme over at Shilah, a monthly post of ten things that are making your life sweet! Truth be told, there's a lot going on right now that I'm not happy about, but what a perfect time for me to refocus on the (insanely)positive?

Here they are, ten things that are sweetening up my little corner of the universe:

1. My mom, for trying her hardest to make things work, and helping me stay sane, and even making me LAUGH. She had it rough this past week, and it was one of the most stressful weeks I've had in a while, but Sunday we agreed to completely take the day off, and do nothing productive-so we took turns with our Zelda: Twilight Princess accounts on the Wii we got for Christmas! We walked each other through stuff and it was awesome fun seeing my mom using the Wiimote as a sword xD. Plus, it was great seeing the ties to the 64 Ocarina of Time (the 64 is the only other console I've owned). Best Sunday I've had in ages. Slashing creatures of darkness and goblins and shooting down monsters and using force fields… now THAT is therapy! (note to HG fans: I named my character Finnick, and whenever I see his name want to cry… WHY HIM?!?!?)

Bottom line: even though we don't always agree, and definitely have our problems, my mom totally rocks...

and really loves to fish!

2. Music: It's in every beat of my heart and makes me dance like a complete moron. Plus, I got some free music off of Purevolume.com's list of Top Unsigned Bands of 2010, and a lot of it is pretty awesome! AND, my mom found my MP3 player under my dad's bed after many months of me trying to live without it, but both of my pairs of earbuds had been broken for even longer than my mp3 player was missing. I tried them out for the heck of it(after digging them out of a junk drawer), and one of them is now working just fine! I can finally use my little baby! YAY :D.

3. Our puppy, Peanut, turned around in a circle five times before settling on my lap. He's actually sleeping in the sun right now, warming up after a bath. Cute little booger. If only he had better bladder control when excited…

4. Wonderful people: My siblings, friends I've known for years(thanks Ali and Henry for letting me dump on you-and sorry I've been such a storm cloud lately), and the amazing people I've been fortunate enough to get to know through blogger. This really is an online community, and it feels great to be a part of it. For all of you, thanks for being awesome and all the support! Your comments really bring me joy-I may be biased, but I personally think I have the best followers ever :D.

5. Do Nothing For 2 Minutes. Jan posted this site on her blog, and it was much needed during a stressful night of homework and applications. It's on my favorites now-thank you!

6. Finishing the Honors College Application for the current college of my choice! I was struggling with the essay, because I wrote one I was actually really proud of, but it was too long. The sucker had to be 2,000 characters, and that's including spaces and punctuation! After removing about 500 characters through tedious rephrasing and punctuating, it was still a little over 100 characters over, and I had my sister look at it and help me shorten it. She. was. a. lifesaver. (edit-I found out that I've been accepted into the Honors College! YES!)

7. Moonlight Path lotion from Bath & Body Works. My FAVORITE fragrance :D (though I normally don't use 'smelly stuff', this accursed cold is drying out my skin, and it just smells sooo good. And you hafta love the new label :D).

8. Things sweetening other people's lives; my sister's brilliant grades, Laurea getting an interview for entrance to a great highschool, Kendra getting her permit, etc! I'm really happy for all of the happiness in YOUR lives, and hope you know that :).

9. Closure-I made a difficult VERY difficult phone call a couple days ago, and even though I didn't hear what I wanted to, I'm still very glad I called. I think I'll do a post on it in the semi-distant future-if I get the chance, I'll definitely tell you guys :).

10. ….and, for my FINAL bit of sweetness…. I received word I'm a National Merit Finalist :). Thank you God…. Thank you, thank you, thank you… This means I get the financial aid I needed-housing for four years-from my current college of choice-also, as a Finalist, that means I'm entered for a National Merit Scholarship, but even if I don't get one, the title is a HUGE blessing as it is. I can hardly comprehend what a huge blessing this is-it is just too big for my little brain...

...and I'm adding one more-a combination of my mom and music: she bought me LUNGS, the Florence and the Machine album that I've been listening to online since Leanna's post on it a while back!!!


Plus, she half bought it because she loves it herself-when she heard me listening she asked two questions: Do we own that? and Why don't we own that?!?! I wasn't going to spend the money, but I'm sure glad she did! :D Thanks momma!

Phew... you know what? Taking the time to write out these blessings, especially the college related ones, has helped me to feel more at peace. Just sitting here, I feel... like I have a slightly altered view of my world, in a good way :). If any of you want to do it as well, comment and let me know, and head on over to Shilah to link up (clicking the button up top is the simplest way to find the posts, in my opinion) :). Wishing you all the sweetest things life has to offer,


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(¸.· Elizabeth *´¨)
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The places from which I got pictures of...
Link
Link Fishing
Moonlight Path
LUNGS Album Art

Oh, It Is Love (Holiday Update + An Acceptance Letter!)

"How was your winter break?"

"Three days were wonderful, and the rest pretty much sucked. How was your break?"

Hmmm… not sure if honesty is the most socially accepted way to answer that question, but honesty IS the best policy, so I just might go with that. You see, I was thinking the other day about school starting back, and what I'd say to those smiling faces who actually dare to try talking to the sullen mute depressing blah I've become. And in my head, that was the simplest summary of my break possible. Which caused me to seriously think about WHY that was the case. Well, how about we look at those three wonderful days?

My 18th Birthday-my family and I went to see Tron in theaters, and met Henry there :). On the way there, my dad was a total jerk and actually shocked us all into silence with his hostility. I mean, it was my 18th birthday, AND I wasn't feeling too good, and he chooses right before we get to the theater to go psycho about tickets and how I shouldn't assume that he was paying for ANYTHING and more I don't even want to think about right now. My mom sister and I were taken aback, and I wanted to beat the snot out of him, but when we were walking up to the theater and I saw Henry I felt worlds better. We all watched the movie, and afterward came home and I had a peanut butter fudge shake from Sonic while everyone else ate pizza. Then, Henry and I watched How To Train Your Dragon in the living room, and I fell asleep… I was still on pain meds and antibiotics, and had been fighting to keep my eyes open all day. It was great, though, because he was still there when I woke up, and gave me the most wonderful birthday card ever written, and was there to hold me as I fought tears of joy ^_^. So, bottom line, my birthday started really rough but wound up wonderful :).

Christmas Eve-my brother and his wife came over, and we opened up a couple gifts, and they gave us their Wii :D. We played it for most of the night, and there was a lot of laughter as my mom learned how to drive on Mariokart XD. After they left, we opened the rest of our gifts, and people liked what I gave them, and I loved my presents, and it was just a lot of fun. I loved seeing momma HAPPY… when she smiles it really does warm my heart. She doesn't smile enough… during the holiday season we call my dad the Grinch, and Christmas is always a desperate attempt to make the day great despite the familial warfare, and this year WE BEASTED. So yeah, I'm happy about it.

December 28th-Henry invited me to celebrate Christmas with his family, and they were getting together that evening. We ate, and talked, and his family is pretty amazing :). They opened gifts, and his family and his aunt actually got me presents, which I wasn't expecting at all, and about made me cry happily... Henry loved his gift(a clan crest key fob-his family is of Scottish descent), which made my lungs feel like they were going to burst I was so relieved and overjoyed!!! I thought it was cool, and was hoping he did too :D :D :D. I gave MG, his awesome sister, Flipped by Wendelin Van Draanen and The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins, both of which are personal favorites. She hasn't gotten to HG yet, but read Flipped and loved it! YAY! Anyway, after we opened presents us three, Henry, MG, and I, went outside and played in the snow-something I haven't done in years. The stars shone brightly, and we laughed, and pelted each other with snow, and made snow angels, and more :). It was just a magical evening ^_^.

And the rest of the days of my break? I worked some (got told to look for another job by my manager, who simply said that I wasn't 'raunchy and wild' enough to fit in with my coworkers, and just didn't belong. Not kidding. I'm okay with it though… I'll explain further if anyone cares to hear details), slept a LOT (I met with a clinical psychologist, who I didn't like that all, and he prescribed a low dose antidepressant to help me cope with my 'situational depression', which I DO like because it seems to be helping, but it made me freakishly drowsy all the time, so I'm now taking it at night), and was mostly home with my dad… and we don't get along. When the new year arrived, I was home alone with D. A little while after an awkward toast, I went to the bathroom and was fighting tears, chewing myself out for being an emotional wreck. This year will be a HUGE one for me-I'm FINALLY moving out, going to college, growing up, breaking FREE from this prison. I'm going to need my mom's support more than ever… and she, and my sister, were at work when the ball dropped. It wasn't their fault, and I'm not mad about it at all, it just felt wrong. Everything has felt wrong lately. The biggest difference between those few great days and all of the crappy ones is who I was with. On those three days, I was with people I love, and who love me. I was able to laugh, able to smile… and the rest, not so much. I'm sorry I haven't posted, or read your posts or commented. I'm just disconnected right now, emotionally detached, and haven't even been checking my email.

Anyway, on a VERY POSITIVE NOTE: I've been accepted to the Great University, and received the Presidential Scholarship-which means full tuition! It is really amazing, and I'm so fortunate… I'll be going there next weekend for a scholars' dinner and a campus tour. I can't wait! Right now that is the only college that has given me a response, but I can't imagine getting a better offer than that…. I guess I'll see ^_^. I'm also making another college visit next week, and school starts back tomorrow, so I'm going to have to snap out of this and really get myself moving. There is too much to be done for me to be a space cadet! Thankfully I know that no matter how hard it gets, I'll make it-because I'm not alone, no matter how alone I feel sometimes. I am loved, and focusing on that fact is what has allowed me to smile at all during my time in this house. Soon enough, I will be free… anyway, I'm sorry for vanishing everyone. I hope you haven't given up on me! I also hope that you had a wonderful Christmas, that you were able to spend time with loved ones, and that this coming year is better than last year was for all of you :).

--

"But you see, it's not me, it's not my family.

In your head, in your head they are fighting,

With their tanks and their bombs,

And their bombs and their guns.

In your head, in your head, they are crying..."

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(¸.· Elizabeth *´¨)

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Music That Moves Us: Life Starts Now (my first guest post!)

Hello everyone! I'll post more about what happened later, but the bottom line is my wisdom teeth removal did not go well. I'm really swollen, and dizzy from the medicine, and was talking to my wonderful friend Henry about my music that moves me post-I had a great song picked out, but was struggling with writing anything decent because I'm so messed up right now(I'll post on that song another time). Then, I asked if he'd like to guest post! He has great taste in music, and is a great writer, and I'm honored that he is willing to do this for me! Thanks Henry-you're a life saver :). Without further ado, his post:

"You say you feel so down
Every time I turn around
And you say you should've been gone by now
And you, you think that everything's wrong
You ask me how to carry on
We'll make it through another day just hold on.

Cause life starts now.
You've done all the things that could kill you somehow
And you're so far down
But you will survive it somehow because life starts now"
Life Starts Now-Three Days Grace

I like this song because the singer encourages us that we will survive "it" somehow. When we're feeling down, sometimes it's so hard to see the bigger picture. Life doesn't end when we fail to do the thing we attempt; life starts NOW, when we make these decisions that will alter our attitudes and worldview. You can choose to remain down, and fix nothing, or you can get help from a friend, or parent or adult who has struggled with the same things you are going through (btw, if you don't feel like you have someone to talk to about your problems, I would urge you to talk to Elizabeth. She is a great encourager and sympathizer, and she will listen to you =) I'll let her give you her contact info). I guess one thing I'm trying to say is that you need someone to help you gain perspective over the situation. That's what the singer does for his friend in this song:

"All this pain,
Take this life and make it yours!
All this hate!
Take your heart and let it love again,
You will survive this somehow!!!"

When we lose perspective of what life means and what our purpose is, it's easy to feel like it's all over if we mess up. It is so important that you have a friend who can keep you focused, a friend who you can confide in with your decisions.

I hope the song helps you to keep perspective about life =) And I hope you enjoy! Take care,

-Henry

Thank you so much for this, Henry... great post :). And because I know how hard it can be sometimes to stay in perspective, and I know the value of encouragement and support and simply having someone to listen, I have no problem with talking any of you who need to let it out. My new email address is acollectionofreflections(at)gmail(dot)com, and don't hesitate to send me an email. I hope that you enjoyed this post, and the wonderful song! Also, thanks to Aaron/Nihil for following! Welcome to my bit of the blogosphere :). Thanks for reading everyone,


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(¸.· Elizabeth *´¨)
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Giving Thanks+Fun at a Red Light!

Thanksgiving, such a glorious holiday where we all stuff our faces and remain full for days... at least, everyone I've talked to about their Thanksgiving said with a smile and a distant expression 'I ate too much...' :D. Mine was bittersweet. Started off rough, family arguing...my dad was trying to get my mom to go to a movie that afternoon, and she didn't want to go without me, and he was freaking out because he wasn't getting his way. Then I got to go to Henry's house to celebrate with his family and have lunch, which was absolutely wonderful! His family was fun to be around, and it was (kinda) his dad's birthday, and his dad's sister (so Henry's aunt) made an absolutely amazing cake that looked like a cooked turkey! The food was great, and MG, Henry's sister, showed me how to make a cootie-catcher with post-its(I hadn't made one in years, and had forgotten how).

I showed her how to make an origami frog, and then we made a bunch, and I accidentally made one jump into Henry's cup of coffee XD. Then she got a sheet of green paper and made a HUGE one, but it couldn't jump worth a fart :). My neck was still hurting a little, but it wasn't cry-my-eyes-out pain, it was more dang-I-shouldn't-keep-turning-my-head pain. It would have been nice to talk more, but I had a lot of fun and am so grateful that he was willing to share his family and that day with me :). I wish I hadn't had to leave...but eventually I did, and when at home watched a movie with my parents (The Expendables, actually... LOL) then carried on with my day as if it wasn't a holiday. I loved seeing everyone's 'Happy Thanksgiving' posts, and this was part of one of my favorites:
"Before you pass out from the spread of food upon the dining room table...
Before you enter the rush of the Christmas season, awaking at 3am to grab the "hottest" deals of the season...
Before it becomes politically correct to refer to it merely as Turkey Day...
Can we stop?
Thanksgiving. Merriam Webster defines this as the act of giving thanks; a prayer expressing gratitude; and a public acknowledgement or celebration of divine goodness.
That cuts me to my core, what about you? I don't know if I've ever stopped to read the definition before, but that's loaded with a basis in God and in His providence." (from Lane Lareau, see here)
I've never actually seen the definition of Thanksgiving before. And really, that is what the day is about, right? So my family didn't have a meal together, no one cooked anything, the house was a wreck and we watched a violent movie. That isn't reason for me to be disappointed-if anything, I should be laughing! Actually, I'm laughing right now! But the bottom line is, I have so MUCH to be grateful for.

Right now, I am thanking you God, and I hope you can hear me. For my confidant and faithful friend, Henry. For momma. For A being such a great friend even though I'm horrible at replying to emails! For my wonderful brother and for Mrs. A. both supporting me despite my failings. For my other couple friends who still love me even though I'm the most horrible friend in the world. For my job, even though things aren't going that great lately. For letting me be a Semifinalist! For my SAT scores rising. For those people I've never let myself invest in, but who seem more than ready to be there for me anyway. For my family's health and the roof over our heads. I am so very fortunate... and I know that I don't thank you enough. So, from here on out, I'm going to try my hardest to remember the good things and stay positive. In the past couple weeks, my depression has really taken a toll on me, and I'm simply not feeling good right now. I actually didn't go to school today, for the first time in my life, because I just didn't think I could take it. But I am alive. And I will get through this ginormous pile of crap that is my life. And then I'll take a long, hot, shower and get all clean and comfy, and smile and thank you yet again for helping me through it all. Thanks again,
Your Lost Child, Elizabeth

OKAY, well now that I've gotten that out, FUNNY STORY TIME! The other day I was on my way home from work, and was at a red light, and a song I love came on the radio(mentioned here), and I started bouncing around the car like a crazy person. I turned it up so loud the car was shaking, and I was really really cold, which meant I was moving more than normal because I WAS COLD, even though I was wearing a scarf and my leather jacket! After I'd danced and beat up my steering wheel for a while, I remembered that I was wearing a santa hat.

Why? Because for the entire month of December, it is part of my uniform, and I am not allowed to work without it. So eventually the light turned green, and I was driving along, and the person on the other side of the intersection wasn't going even though the light was green, and I wondered why until I passed them and saw the head of the driver turn around to look at the twiggy chick in a leather jacket blasting Rise Against on the day after Thanksgiving... in a santa hat. Apparently, they didn't notice the light had changed.... LOL :D.

Anyway, sorry for the random and disconnected post... lol. Also, I'd like to thank you my followers for reading, including my newest follower Sarah! You guys rock!

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(¸.· Elizabeth *´¨)
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Frog Image from here.

Santa Hat Image from here.

Music that Moves Me: My Sacrifice

My friend recently shared this song with me, and I'm so grateful for it. It is a perfect description of how he makes me feel...

"When you are with me,
I'm free,
I'm careless,
I believe,
Above all the others,
We'll fly,
This brings tears,
To my eyes..."
My Sacrifice-Creed

This song captures that feeling, of knowing that someone else is there for you no matter what and loves you for you are, so perfectly. (Thanks for being a true friend, Henry ;)). Listen here:



What do you guys think? Has anyone ever made you feel so free?

Thanks for reading,

--
"But you see, it's not me, it's not my family.
In your head, in your head they are fighting,
With their tanks and their bombs,
And their bombs and their guns.
In your head, in your head, they are crying..."


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(¸.·´¸.·*´¨) *
(¸.· Elizabeth *´¨)
¸.·´ ¸.·*´¨) *
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